Demons for Tea
Kate Morgan
Genre: Supernatural Thriller
Publisher: Omnium Gatherum Books
Date of Publication: Sept. 10, 2018
ISBN: 9781949054019;
ISBN: 1949054012
Number of pages: 285
Word Count: 80,000
Cover Artist: Kate Jonez
Tagline: Kicking ass and eating ramen: An exorcist’s life ain’t like the movies.
Book Description:
Ex-priest Denis Kaine's surviving on ramen and kicking otherworldly creatures off this planet. It's all noise to fill his chasm of hate and guilt inside from letting his twin brother blow his brains out because he’d been possessed. Denis should’ve known. He should’ve seen. He should’ve… everything.
His survival techniques are no match for Emma Koroleva, the 1200-year-old entity he freed from imprisonment in Rome. She's powerful, she's got major attitude, and she hates ramen.
She changes into various poltergeists and forces Denis to "exorcise" her. Denis gets paid, they eat real food, and she toys with seducing him. Denis starts to think he's living in the sitcom from hell until he learns his dead brother's become the plaything of something big, strong, and evil. Screw sitcoms. Denis is about to prove why his rep is legendary in the spirit world.
Excerpt:
Someone knocked
at the door.
at the door.
On a Sunday
afternoon? If it was a Girl Scout, she’d be disappointed. My entire liquid
income consisted of the twelve dollars and three quarters in my wallet. I
pulled off the Roman collar, so she wouldn’t get a bad impression of priests in
general and unbolted the door.
afternoon? If it was a Girl Scout, she’d be disappointed. My entire liquid
income consisted of the twelve dollars and three quarters in my wallet. I
pulled off the Roman collar, so she wouldn’t get a bad impression of priests in
general and unbolted the door.
It crashed open
with a blue-green-flowery gust of wind. I spun around and slammed it shut. My
messenger bag stood ready within arm’s reach on the kitchen table. All I had to
do—
with a blue-green-flowery gust of wind. I spun around and slammed it shut. My
messenger bag stood ready within arm’s reach on the kitchen table. All I had to
do—
“It is ridiculously
cold outside. Where is your fireplace?”
cold outside. Where is your fireplace?”
A black-haired
woman as tall as—no, taller than me by an inch or two—strode into my living
room and back again.
woman as tall as—no, taller than me by an inch or two—strode into my living
room and back again.
“Bah. Are you a
herder of reindeer that you can stomach this cold without a fire? I am not. I
require heat and coffee and food.”
herder of reindeer that you can stomach this cold without a fire? I am not. I
require heat and coffee and food.”
Her flowered
dress looked more suited to August than late March. Her windblown hair reached
below her waist, the fluorescent light striking midnight-blue highlights from
it. The colors of her energy reminded me of something, but I couldn’t place it.
dress looked more suited to August than late March. Her windblown hair reached
below her waist, the fluorescent light striking midnight-blue highlights from
it. The colors of her energy reminded me of something, but I couldn’t place it.
“Look, whoever
you are, I didn’t invite you here.” I opened the door, which put me even nearer
to my messenger bag. “Out.”
you are, I didn’t invite you here.” I opened the door, which put me even nearer
to my messenger bag. “Out.”
She laughed.
One beat: I
flipped open the front of the messenger bag. Two beats: I snatched the squeeze
bottle I kept holy water in. On the third beat I popped the nozzle and squirted
the perpendicular strokes of a cross at her.
flipped open the front of the messenger bag. Two beats: I snatched the squeeze
bottle I kept holy water in. On the third beat I popped the nozzle and squirted
the perpendicular strokes of a cross at her.
“Merda.” She
shivered and vanished.
shivered and vanished.
Whatever she
was, she moved faster than most entities. As I repacked the holy water, it hit
me that she’d said “shit” in Italian not like she was angry. More like she was
annoyed because I’d gotten her dress wet.
was, she moved faster than most entities. As I repacked the holy water, it hit
me that she’d said “shit” in Italian not like she was angry. More like she was
annoyed because I’d gotten her dress wet.
About the Author:
Baker of brownies and tormenter of characters, Kate Morgan celebrates the the day she jumped the wall with as much enthusiasm as her birthday. She grew up watching Hammer horror films and Scooby-Doo mysteries, which explains a whole lot.
When she takes a break from inspiring nightmares, she writes ex-nun PI mysteries under her real name, Alice Loweecey. In her spare time she can be found growing vegetables in her garden and water lilies in her koi pond.
Newsletter: https://tinyletter.com/AliceLoweecey
Website: www.aliceloweecey.net
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/GiuliaDriscoll/
(It’s confusing, I know. Facebook wouldn’t let me create an author page under my own name, so I had to use my MC’s name. Branding. It’s so much fun.)
Twitter: https://twitter.com/KateMorganBooks
Twitter: https://twitter.com/AliceLoweecey
Interview with Kate Morgan
Do your characters seem to hijack the story or do you feel like you have the reigns of the story?
I’m a die-hard outliner. As in, 5K-10K per outline every time. And for every book, usually at the one-third point but sometimes earlier or later, my characters get together over a few beers to point and laugh at my outline. Then they drag the part of the outline they want to be in to the place I left off. I’m sure I’ve heard them laugh at me while I take scissors and tape to my outline to adapt to their demands. In an early book I tried to wrench the story back to where I’d originally planned it. It was a disaster. Ever since then, I let the characters take the story and run with it.
Convince us why you feel your book is a must read.
It’s funny. We need more funny these days. It’s also scary, and like all good horror a vicarious shiver up the spine is the best kind. It also has sex (gasp!) and cooking and some seriously cool supernatural creatures from cultures all around the world. It’s like a vacation for your mind! (Yes, I said my own book was good. Total strangers are buying it. This is an author’s dream.)
Have you written any other books that are not published?
Two. One dystopian YA and one vampire mystery. Those are out on sub, so in the immortal words of the NYS Lottery: Hey, you never know.
Pen or type writer or computer?
Fountain pen and computer. We have koi ponds in our backyard and I write by hand out on the deck every chance I get. If the words aren’t flowing by hand, I’ll switch to keyboard and vice-versa. If I’m getting down to the wire on a deadline, it’s all keyboard. I wrote 5K a few Saturdays ago because I had to. Supper was takeout that night!
Anything you would like to say to your readers and fans?
There’s a 1970s bubble bath commercial aimed at stressed-out women. Its tagline was “Calgon, take me away!” My books are like that: I write mini vacations for the mind. Come take a funny-scary-sexy-tasty vacation with me.
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